I'm having trouble finding myself

amongst all the drowning

the words the thoughts the over and unders

the worries like the panic I saw in the woman's eyes

at the coffee shop, normal but crazed, with a certain charge

that said: don't get too close. and I sift through all this

like dirty laundry, smelly, hot from the dryer, tied into knots

you will never be able to untie, I cannot tell what is clean

what I should wear and what I should get rid of

all the while looking for something true a glimmer

somewhere is there something I can hold onto.