goodbye

we rush our goodbyes cram them

into the space between the closing doors

or the moment right before a taxi pulls up at the curb

to whisk one of us away

before that moment our time stretches luxuriously

we tip our caps and push out the edges of each others company

one of us with our hands pressed up against the start and the other

the reproachable end until we encompass the seconds after sunrise

and the moments before dusk's departure and sometimes further

(into night)

until the train schedules cut us short

in some ways we are smart

we sat in the park and when i tried to put pep on

to wear it like a mask to press it into my skin so i could feel it

one wise word from you and i was naught

proof of my inability

to put on faces with you

proof of your ability to see beneath,

above anyone else

we rushed to the train

(you had to use the bathroom)

and missed one

sat in a dingy subway station slowly

contemplating the gravity of distance and time

thoughts impossible to feel leaning

against you closely with the possibility of a kiss

and a touch

and a look

when the train came

we grabbed hands
rattled along in the underbelly

of the beast

it came to my stop and you

planned to switch cars

we disconnected corpora

and spun out through metal frames

jumping together

our cars were pushed on--apart--

by the force of that moment

tailending off the tracks

spinning at the junction 

it was sudden

shocking and sweet